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Tentacles

  Jim has tentacles in me. Every part of my being.They are wrapped around my mind, woven throughout my body and engrained in my soul. His warm, soft tentacles encircled my heart and as they balance it...

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Battles Within

Enjoying Chincoteague Island and thankful for The Refuge Inn! Mother’s Day 2015. It has been time for a new post for quite a while and I have written many in my mind. But sitting down to express my...

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Survival of the Fittest

Jim, Frances and Brad enjoying skipping stones on the Maury River in Virginia. June 2015. It has been 6 long years since we first started figuring out something was “wrong” with Jim. To some, this will...

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There is a Solution, I just haven’t found it yet

I am exhausted. Mentally more than physically. The paperwork. The worry. The constant watch. The pure, unadulterated sadness. It is beyond overwhelming, it has changed my thought process, my soul and...

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A world without Jim?

  Visiting Monticello,July 2015. Please, please, make all of this go away. The pain. The worry. The decisions. The agony of watching Jim slide away as we try to cling to him. As he tries to cling to...

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What do YOU really think?

How many drive the car they drive to impress others? Or wear certain clothes to attract attention? Or cut their hair just to entice a mate? Who in this world bases each action or decision on the...

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Alone

Frances, me and Brad getting ready to leave family camp. Aug 2015. In the middle of the night I reached out, my legs stretching to a cooler feel of sheets only to find an empty bed. An empty space that...

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Nap Time

I have nothing. Nothing to say. Nothing to feel. Nothing to do. I am numb. I am going through motions and I am doing the obligatory foot in front of another, but the reality is I am dazed, confused and...

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Phantom Lover

I’m in love with a man who cannot love me back. I think of him all day, every day of every week of every month. From my first moments lying in bed in the morning until my last tired thoughts trying to...

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And the Grief Goes On

Visiting Jim at his new home. October 2015. There is a time in everyone’s life where you learn who you are and transform into the person you were always meant to be. Welcome to my time. I am...

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